We have definitely been earning our "rights" as parents these past few months as we have spent hours and hours holding, comforting and soothing our little Eli. Some days I feel sorry for my fussy little punkin, and some days I feel sorry for me. Yesterday was a feel-sorry-for-myself kind of day, and although Eli received my attention, he didn't receive my sympathy. I spent some time last night crying a little and feeling guilty that I was preferring Gage over Eli right then. "When is Eli going to be as lovable as Gage?" I thought. I hate to even admit that because Moms aren't supposed to think like that!
Later, after Gage was in bed, I put Eli to sleep in my arms. When Craig asked me if I was going to put him down I realized I didn't want to. Even after holding him all day, I didn't want to put him down. Finally I did and as I laid him in his bed I prayed over him. Instead of praying that he would be a happy baby and more content, and I would have patience, etc. etc., I prayed that God would give Eli rest and peace this night, and that I would take things as they come one day at a time.
God must have heard me last night, and after many nights of praying similarly, he decided to answer this prayer. Eli slept long stretches in between feedings and he awoke the happiest baby in the world. What a treat! I know that there will be more fussiness and more sleepless nights to come, but my focus now is just to take it one day at a time.
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